Captured
by scharlie. co
Summary: Just after the technos have turned on the electricity. Unlikely girl finds herself in the harsh above ground reality. OC/Jay
1. Battered

Captured.

The rubble stirred beneath her feet as she looked over the remnants of her home. A sob slowly crawled its way up her throat that she tried to gulp down. No use. Tears unceremoniously flowed down her dirt stained skin. Unwanted memories played themselves out on this broken stage; her parents grabbing there coats and leaving out the front door. Her and her sister not knowing that it would be the last time they would ever see them again. This muck, this mess was where her life had centred and had been her entire world. Oh how quickly it could all be ripped away. Naive Hazel Attwood had no idea what had been coming in deed. She coughed. A panic in her set in; that was how it all started. Just a cough, no one could have thought it would be more than a wimpy cold. Now as she stared at the bare house around her she knew the virus had been no wimpy cold. The virus had broken out in a matter of days. News announcements and radio broadcasts had droned on about the safety of the city was assured by the worlds leading scientists that the strain of the virus would barely affect anyone at all.

That didn't stop police taking anyone over the age of eighteen away to the safe zone. Her head spun to look over the horizon where the faint outline of thousands of crosses blurred into one. The safe zone.

Children hadn't taken long to form little clusters together. It became survival of the fittest. Houses like her own got ransacked and she estimated half of the people here were starving and the biggest clusters were to self absorbed to care. Her blood boiled as she thought of them. Technos and those bloody Mall Rats. She grit her teeth at just the mention of them. They were both trying to sell that they were all for democracy and everyone's equal benefit that they would not oppress the people. Load of bullshit. Here kids worked to the bone for game credits. Game credits. What good were they for? Nothing. These high almighty jerks couldn't give them a hole free roof over their heads or an apple to bite into but they could shell out propaganda left and right. They turned on the power grid and the water. Good on 'em but they kept this game running so that there would always be a profit. Bunch of pathetic kids she thought bitterly.

While this was all happening somehow she had managed to control her emotions enough to make a sanctuary for the little ones and a source of purpose for the older ones. Sixteen and starting her own tribe. Ambitious, she thought with a sarcastic sneer. He little sister Prue had been dragged through the bulk of it, the early stages. To her credit she had handled it pretty well and having being obsessed with finance and current affairs before the virus she made a mighty fine leader. She always had her hand to guide Prue when she could but her Military and Medical duties usually kept her busy. Before the virus her father had always let her come into the family practice and worked on minor cases. It was her passion the military was a secondary thing that just came to her naturally. Routes and retrievals were all easy but you had to have some perception of what was out there before you could make even your most simple plan carry out. This retrieval of young kids the ones Technos and Mall Rats rode off as slaves and disposable made the community adopt the name Project Life. Since the community grew stronger and now had what they called 'professionals' which were really just kids who knew a bit more than the average student about their study area. Creative ones entertained and did there thing and the farmers doubled as black ops agents scrounging and harvesting food in the above world. Soldiers were those looking for a purpose or just good fighters

Her stomach turned as she heard the workers siren. The Technos and the workers were about to emerge from the mines and return to the city. It was time to go back down home to the prohibition tunnels. Her heart wrenched as she remembered what was waiting for her down there at home. Her sister, her niece and her fiancee Axel.

It was eerily quiet as she strolled through the streets of the city. The buildings no longer had life in them and it always felt cold, somewhat dispatched here. Unlike in the tunnels where in the enclosed space kept everything in constant warmth and a sense of security was washed over you once you walked in. She sighed heavily as she made her way to the grate.

Axel was waiting for her there when she finally made her way down. The smell of him was intoxicating he had clearly just taken a bath. He smelt of pine needles and cinnamon, he had a way of finding the little luxuries at the above markets. He stood there smirking at her in his black T-shirt and jeans.

"Hazel, do you know how dangerous it is to be up there, your cutting it pretty close" he said dropping the attitude "but I'm glad you're back, you were missed"

He kissed her on the cheek then turned as a soldier beckoned him back for business. She sighed, maybe she could catch up with him later.

She shook her head in disbelief how could life get this amazingly smooth in a world that had been ripped into rough pieces. Her boots made echoing thuds as she moved through the outskirts of the tunnel system where only herself, Axel, Prue and VI5 black ops were allowed to pass during the week. It was for everyone's' safety of course. Whenever lifers go above they are at risk of being captured and tortured by technos for information in where project life was operating from. Her body winced at the thought, Axel had been one of the victims of the technos. Nobody knows how he escaped. All we saw was a broken man blood pouring profusely show up at one of our safe houses. I had treated him.

Bright light.

My eyes seared as they couldn't move away from the light being shoved in them. The dream had been so weird, why do I always dream as an observer? Tears began to form in around the rim of my eyes as I remembered the last time I had saw Axel, we had never gotten to the room because just like that the shutters came down and the technos began to raid.

My strangled cries did nothing as the inner city shut doors and closed off tunnel access to keep the invaders out. Me with them. A security measure I had put in force. Oh the irony. I remember standing there screaming my head off to let me in. It became dark and cold as all the lights and heating went off in an instant. There was no use trying to hide I could already hear them approaching yelling 'we've got one' and the shuffling of their boots. A torch,like this one in my eyes now, bore into me and behind it a sea of metallic faces focused on me intently. If I had flinched I would have been killed on the spot.

"Welcome back sleeping beauty" a nasally voice I now knew too well forced me into full conciousness.

"Good morning honey, did you come home late last night? I didn't see you at all" I groan in a half hearted attempt to stay sarcastic. He hadn't paid his usual midnight visit to try and crack me last night.

My cheek burns as he slaps me across the face. I knew that would happen. Ved, has a short temper and an even shorter ego. Tears well up as the pain begins to register, this is going to be a long interrogation today. Pieces of paper slammed on to the table I've been chained to. I already know what's in it; everything the technos could find on Project Life. To their credit they did find something which was a feat in itself. The raid, even though it didn't work, had effectively showed what they were capable of. Now without realising it, they had captured the second in command of the full operation. Of course, I would never tell them that and that is why my skin is stained with black and blue bruises and my hair is matted in blood. A story of red where I have been in this room makes my stomach turn. The rustic smell curls through and protrudes my nose.

"Oi, Virt, did you hear me!" Shit, I keep fading out of his speeches. Now, I'm listening. I give him a blank look with my bruised eyes.

"Look, you're going on a holiday. You're going to visit my older brother who found out you just got in" Ved rolled his eyes and turned his mouth up in disgust. "So we're going to pretty you up. And you're going to say how well you've been treated since getting here and you're not going to be talking about our little chats."

He grabbed me by the bloodstained collar of my shirt and with a whisper of "Got it" he was storming out of the room.

I let a small sigh escape my lips as I realised that conversation was probably going to be the highlight of my day. This room was depressing. Everything was too quiet the only noise I could here was the sound of my wheezing breath. Trying to shift around in the chair I tried my best to get into as comfortable position as possible which was hard considering my hands were forever tied to the table. Sleep was hard but I knew that I would be able to manage a small nap at least if I tried to avoid moving the side where Ved had cracked one of my ribs trying to get some 'friendly chatter' going. When in doubt hope for the best was what was going through my head as my eyes closed.

I open my eyes to see a much cleaner room surrounding me. Either someone had cleaned it or I had been moved. It was hard to tell. The walls were a brighter white. Was that natural light casting shadows? I swing my head around to see yes a full window is letting the cloudy day cast a grey light over the world. There were technos outside training, oh, other people! How I had missed seeing other human beings. I can't believe I had actually started to miss Ved after he left our little chats.

The room was immaculate. I let my lungs drink in the fresh air, letting the oxygen soak in. This feeling was amazing I had not felt like this since- I lower my eyes to look at the bright green floor. I can't avoid what I feel so when the anguish of losing my family rushes over me, I give in. There is no need to act brave here. My tombstone has already been carved because of that one night. Oh how I could relive that one night.

The clock is ticking and with every tick my nerves grind down further in my stomach. Sixty one, sixty two, sixty three that clock counts off my nerves. I believe its' time to shut it up. I get off the chair and literally drag the table with me to the right wall. I lay back calmly on the desk and lift my legs up to the clock and kick it. It rocks from side to side and teeters to my hearts desire. Yet it does nothing. So with a determined huff I roll off the table. Brainwave. I stare up at the still rocking clock. That's when I face my table and smile for the cameras and thrust my back into the wall with a resounding thud.

The door clicks open and a bunch of metal heads file in and make a semi circle around me. I look at them with my best Bambi eyes. My ears tune in only to the sound of the clock. The metal heads hold up their weapons at me unwavering, some cock their heads to the side confused as to why this manic girl through herself into a wall. CRASH. The clock finally hits the ground with a satisfying shatter. Pieces of glass fall and scratch my angles. I look at the metal heads. A laugh bubbles up my throat and it pops in my mouth. To be honest I had expected a giggle, maybe a little laugh but when I hear let it out it sounds like a broken and sadistic cackle. They look at me with more confusion, so with this awkward pause I sink back down into my chair. Slowly. So I don't get shot or anything.

"File out, this is my interrogation" A thick voice says.

I look at him and almost choke. He's gorgeous. In a guy way. This guy stands before me thin and tall with brown eyes and blonde hair which he runs a hand through as he casually brings the chair from the other side of the room to my table. When he sits down and puts his arm folded across to stare at me my mouth falls open in amazement. A little guilt swirls around my stomach as I think of Axel but I push it down, I'm on death row, staring won't hurt. His eyes twinkle in amusement at my obvious floundering expression at his godlike beauty. Awkwardly I shut my mouth and try regain my sarcastic unimpressed look, kind of.

"Surprised?" he says with a slightly lighter voice.

His voice ruins it. He puts a reality into his body and the whole twenty second personality I had built up to him crashes. I remember why I'm here. His people abducted me and have starting regular beatings and starvation techniques for experiments. This, this, this guy believes that this kind of treatment of people from a different life is fair. Taking food from everyone's' mouths and forcing labour. Bile bit up in my throat. How amusing if I threw back up the disgusting food they supplied the lower class onto his black suit. I flick my eyes over him. He's staring down at the smashed clock around my ankles. I glance and see that a number of the shards are cutting into my skin with a little of the blood staining down the white tights that they had slipped me in to. Ooh, pretty. I hadn't notice them before, I swing my legs a little to watch them stretch and contract. As I'm looking at the tights I notice that they had also put me in a dress. Obviously, the bloody dirty one wasn't up to par for this guest. It was a petty fabric though, midnight blue velvet with a high cut at the neck and long sleeves. Who was I trying to impress in this? Who was Ved trying to impress in this? Woah, what if it was Ved who got me into this? Yuck .

A slam down on the table makes me jump out of my skin. His balled up fists turn red in contrast to the cream white table. He looks at me with such underlying fury I feel like I have been chucked off the chair and into the wall behind me.

"I'm not wasting my time here" he exasperates "If your lucky enough to have escaped them then you can just let me know"

He pulls out his chair and comes to my side. There's a weird moment where I flinch at his approaching figure. There's' a knowing look shared and I realise that they plan this. This whole routine. Bad cop, Good cop how ironic that they have the brothers doing it. I decide its time to put on a little charade. I look up at him through my eyelashes adopting my best Bambi look. I let some tears well up in my eyes as if I'm realising for the first time that someone actually believes that I'm innocent. When he's walking around and within my grasp I grab at his shirt and bring him down to me gently. I look into his eyes and begin to cry full on. There's a surprise look in his gaze as he pulls me closer to him. The cameras creek as they begin to zoom in on us. The embrace is cold, he runs his hands through my combed hair and soothes me with nothings in my ear.

"You're safe with me" he says in a mechanical voice, how many times has he done this? How many people has he done this too? "I'll help you, anyway I can, we can do it as a team" He kisses my hair.

"I-I don't even know your name" I whisper

"Jay, just Jay" he murmurs into the bottom of my neck. He holds my arm as my pseudo tears rack through my body.

I bring his face up cupping it in my hand. Making my lips quiver I stutter out some words.

"What-What did you say? You can tell me" He's good, I bring him even closer to my face and breathe.

"Oh Jay. It's horrible, I was, I... I'm second in command of the whole operation. I know exactly what tactics your using and the next time you try it on me I'll kill you with or without the use of my hands." I laugh a little sadistically.

There's an almost instant recoil. He moves away and looks at me with such disgust. I shoot back daggers at him, he's upset that I found him out. I almost expect him to pout but he doesn't he just goes back to his place on the other side of the table then runs his hands over his mouth. I wait for him to speak realising it probably wasn't wise to mention the fact I was second in command. There is no time to think about what could have been but I do thinking about what would have happened if I had kept playing along. Surely he doesn't think how he was speaking was impassioned. He's shaking with fury and its creeping me out. The room feels like its burning up.


	2. Broken

"You've just become a lot more", he grunts, "Valuable".

"Obviously, scum like your tribe always treat people with information as assets"

There is tangible tension in the room. He's twitching in his chair and I'm twitching in mine both anticipating the first move. He clenches and unclenches his fist before speaking.

"Scum. Like. Me? That's rich coming from the girl who runs the most corrupt tribe in the entire city"

"Corrupt, now that's rich. We are the only tribe in the city to offer a community that resembles something of the old days. We are the only tribe to give options to our people. Do you remember those things Jay? Options? Or are you too caught up getting out the next video game to think about the real world and basic human rights!"

"The real world. You steal children from their homes! What kind of option is that? We have given the people here water, electricity and jobs! The games are for entertainment to bring this place together like TV did before the virus. Why would people willingly leave that? Every person who disappears leaves a life behind and people get hurt. So don't spit your liberation trash at me. We're building something stable." He shouts, rising up and looming over me with a look of stubborn pride.

"What we believe in is trash! Your so ignorant its laughable, except your ignorance means that people here are enslaved to do your will for 'the greater good of the city'. Your ulterior motives are so bloody obvious that believe it or not Jay people willingly leave this place because what your providing is no good! We steal no one, we hurt no one, and we are the voice of the individuals. Uniform mentality doesn't suit everyone but you obviously wouldn't know how individuality works would you because you're a faithful soldier of the techno army. Yes sir, Yes sir, whatever you say sir." I mimic his deep voice poorly but I know I hit a spot when I see him flinch for what is a nanosecond.

"Voice of the individuals. You say I'm the one with uniform thoughts, your spitting out the exact same lines as every other person from your tribe does when we question them. Except for a guy, probably got questioned a couple of months ago, he spoke the truth about your organisation and that's how we found you. He told us everything about what you do, where you are and how you operate. We let him go he was actually alright guy nice to know there are some sensible people."

I almost give him the satisfaction of shutting up. I know exactly who he's talking about but I just can't freaking believe it, I knew, I knew he had to be talking about Axel but he would never sell them out. He had been so broken, so distant since he had come back.

"Hit a sore point did I? Already knew the truth didn't you, you knew your people were unhappy and ready to sell you out" he says smugly.

"You broke him! If this is how you treated him I don't doubt he gave in. When we found him he was broken, battered and well beyond bruised. Guess who had to cut out the metal left when you were done with him" I spat "He was writhing in pain for three days the metal you use is rusty by the way and before you go hurting other people you should expect them to get blood poisoning"

It was his turn to take a step back and I was glad. "That had nothing to do with us, he could of got jumped when we set him free"

"Don't think so you guys have a specific knack to sign off on your work, your insignia is printed on his forearm, for life I would assume"

I think that's when he finally gave up denying and rationalising. He was finally starting to shut up.

"I'm sick of talking to you, you may as well leave" I said

"Don't what to do with truth about your tribe do you, can't even look me in the eye and defend yourself" there was conviction in his voice but there was no longer any confidence or smug pride.

"Get. Out"

"We'll be chatting tomorrow"

"YOU will be, I will sit here and think of ways to waste you for what you did"

"For the record, I knew nothing of what they did to him I only ever tal-" he began.

"You only ever talk to them and then send them off to your little brother to have the crap beaten out of them; you have an idea of what he does"

He walks out of the room and clicks the door shut. The whole experience has left me feeling more empty and depraved than anything else they have done to me.

It's about midnight and I can't sleep. The wound on my rib reopened while I was sleeping, the dress I am wearing now stained. It's taken a while to process but the realisation that I am going to live the rest of my life here because I'm sure they won't let me out of live. There is no reason to have hope and I know it's time to let what little of it I had. It's all gone and all that is left is a gaping hole of pitch black. What is there to wake up for? These kind of thoughts are dangerous, I know but there is just no stopping them once they're there.

"I'm never getting out" I whisper "I'm going to be in this hell forever"

This is how Axel felt, thought and saw the world when he was here. It is scary and lonely; no wonder he did what was necessary to get out. I realise now that none of these tribes are perfect none of them can match the society we lived in before and even it was flawed. The Technos are not the best outfit around and they are certainly not the most liberating lot but they do try and provide where others have just taken. It's not fair to sit on a high horse and look down on these people when we haven't done a lot to help. If I could do it over I would do something better with the community, cautiously though. This revelation is useless though because I am going to die, in what, two maybe three days. My eyes sting as the more I realise the more useless I feel the stinging turns it to full blown tears and it's not long before the waterworks are at its peak. I moan in protest as the more I sob the more my rib aches but I just can't turn them off. I sit and cry; watching and waiting for the sun to arrive.

Its day number…day number… ah heck I should of kept count but it's been a long time. Jay hasn't been making anymore appearances but Ram has and his two wives Siva and Java come along for a bit of spectator sport. As much as I have to grit my teeth to admit, Ram is a technical, practical and business genius. When we reach an impasse or I'm too battered to talk he goes through some of the things the Technos are working on, mostly confidential stuff, I guess he figures I'm not going to live long enough to tell anyone important. Apparently, he's been manipulating the mall rats' popularity and the city leader, Ebony. You can tell he has an infatuation with her, from what I remember most guys did even before the virus. I think back to school and all the drama that surrounded the love triangle which was Bray, Trudy and Ebony. The rumour mill had a field day with those three and having been in their classes meant you always had sit in entertainment. Anyway, back to Ram, his plan was to marry Ebony and get the tri-factor going with the sisters. It was sick but you had to admire his determination. Today was no different, we were back to talking about Ebony.

"She tells me she's hung up on some other guy, says he's dead or something like that" He says with a partially puzzled look.

"Do you want the truth or do you want to keep eating what she's been feeding you" I say between gulping breaths of air and nursing what I think is a fractured wrist.

"Give me your best shot at the truth, amuse me" he laughs, or more cackles.

"She's got a guy right now, having the dead love makes her unavailable and makes the guy inaccessible to you and your…how should we put it…persuasion?" I say "The whole not wanting you to know who it is suggests it's an inside guy, not low enough that he doesn't care whether he loses his job. No, I'd say a higher up, someone close."

"Are you proposing a traitor among my top ranks? I decide who makes the ranks; I think I would know if someone was unfaithful to ME!" his voices rises in what I think is fury but I have a feeling he knew already. "A soldier, a commander of my army would not do such a thing! Don't you dare accuse Jay of that! He is faithful to ME!"

"Hey, hey I never said anything about a commander, soldier or Jay. You're the one who was playing fill in the blanks" I almost laugh "But your guess is probably right"

He started mumbling and grunting in anger, nothing intelligible and without another word wheeled out of the room. It was comforting to think of how he was going to spend the next couple of hours ripping himself apart over whether he had a traitor.

Ah, alone again, time to sleep I guess. I close my eyes and gulp down on the pain.

I screech as the chair beneath me is pulled out and I hit the floor. My hands jerk at an unnatural angle as they pull back from being chained to the table. I scream as I hear a snap. There are hands pulling my legs back causing the table to drag with me across the floor. I'm guessing that its' a techno but a nail digs into my leg and I have a hunch that it's' a certain someone who I pissed off yesterday.

"EBONY! What the heck are you doing!" I almost scream but she cups her hand over my mouth. So, this is black ops.

"You think that was funny, telling Ram the truth. My head is on the chopping block because of you. Marry him or die basically. What kind of game are you playing with me." She kicks me in the ribs.

"Hah, so it is true, been getting a little friendly with the general Jay" I want to sound blasé and sarcastic but it's a little hard when your gasping for air.

"Who the hell are you! Why did you do this and how did you know" She puts her hands around my throat "Tell me or I will waste you right here and now"

She twists me over onto my back and stares down at me. I can't see a thing and I'm guessing she can't see me. I can hear her panting like a wild animal impassioned, erratic and dangerous. There's an awkward silence as we try to make out each other, sizing up the competition. Knowing full well that she has the advantage I cave and decide to fess up.

"I didn't do it for any particular reason, Ram came to me with a problem and I had a stab at what was behind it" my voice is a bit raspy from the choking but I know she heard.

"I don't believe you" her grip tightened, "and you still didn't tell me who you are"

"We've met before" I whisper "First time was third period gym class"

I gasp for air as she lets go. She sits down next to me and helps me push myself up into a more comfortable position. We sit like that for a long time just musing over nothing. When I look at her now she's actually not that different from the best friend I had in high school. It seems like a life time ago that we were out on the grounds gossiping, laughing and flirting with the guys but I still feel the same comfort around her that I did back then.

We had been inseparable since being paired up for volleyball in gym on her first day. She had walked in with a confidence and arrogance that immediately isolated her from the nice girls and was too independent to fit in with the popular girls. The rumours and gossiping that when on about her was unrivalled but she took it with a grain of salt. We had the best time just doing nothing mainly talking about problems which were at the time huge but now are totally insignificant. Where I was definitely a nerd she was a social butterfly jumping from party to part and boy to boy but there was always and unspoken understanding that we were each other's best friends, no one else. That was of course until the virus hit and she decided that Zoot was the way to stay alive. I don't blame her, I didn't exactly stick around to wait for her. The first week had been the most frightening and horrible experience of my life and I wasn't thinking logically for the most part of it.

She snaps me out of my reverie when she says "So, you're alive."

"As are you. Good to know, didn't doubt you would be, you knew what was coming."

Her face seems a little haunted as her head turns to face me, "Are you, you know, mad at me or something…out for revenge?"

I sigh "Honestly, I didn't even know you were here. Ram was the one who brought you up. I was trying to get Jay in trouble; I knew Ram wouldn't do anything against you he's too…" I made a mock voice of one of the snobby girls from school "like, totally in love with you boo"

And because this place is so twisted we both burst out laughing. It's natural and I feel a little ache as though I had forgotten how much I missed this; laughing and being completely strange. I look at her and I know she hasn't laughed in a while too. It's hard not to get a little too serious about everything when you're preoccupied with a post-apocalyptic world that needs running. This place might not be the grounds but it's as good as place as any to catch up. The laughing dies down and we're back to silence when we both realise that we're talking to each other, in a prison cell, with guards watching and she's supposed to not know that I'm here.

"How did you find out that they had taken me prisoner?" It's not like it matters but it'll break the silence.

"I asked. Ram gives me some weight around here. He has me sucked into this little world of his. I run around his little maze rat." She laughs bitterly "A mall rat"

"You're not one of them are you" I groan, "I would prefer you to be one of the Technos'!"

"Why? There's nothing wrong with them, they might be a little…" She drifted off

"Immature, self-serving, deceiving, pretentious and snobbish" I fill in.

"Yes and no, but they've got a lot of heart sitting on top of their high horses" she grits her teeth as she says "even though they grind all my nerves"

It's a side of Ebony that I only ever saw rarely and one that nearly no one else ever sees. Her being humble and defending the upper class is about as common as a good cooked meal by the Technos; rare but not impossible. It makes me wonder how she got so attached, and it also makes a little bit of jealousy worm its way into my stomach. I immediately let it go though we've been out of touch for almost four years it's not surprising that she has a new group to run with…and maybe a new best friend? I almost ask but the question dies, the answer might be something I don't want to hear.

"Jay's a good guy, why would you want to get him in trouble?" She asks with a double meaning. First, why would you want to get MY guy in trouble and the second, what did he do to you to make you want him to get in trouble.

"We've got conflicting morals to say the least" I try to be diplomatic and answer both questions, "we're just polar opposites and I was trying to make his life a little difficult as a bit of pay back for the whole getting tied up and beaten mercilessly"

Ebony retracts a little but not as much as I thought she would. She shakes her head slightly as in disbelief at what I said.

"You and Jay are almost exactly the same! Both of you think you're morally superior" she laughed.

I scoffed at her, "I do not think I am morally superior, you're mistaking me for that Mall Rat leader of yours"

"You do so! That is why you hate the Mall Rats so much; the leader is Amber by the way. They're so much like you that you hate it. That makes me wonder why I hate her but not you. I guess because she's a man thieving and emotionally unstable mess who shouldn't be a leader" There was a bitter edge to her tone.

"She is making a move on Jay?"

"I think so; she did it before with Bray. Not just to me, but to moody Trudy as well"

"C'mon don't call her that" I moan "Anyway, continue"

"She was captured by the Technos too, experimented on or something like that" she sighed "now, she is playing on his guilt to get him to do things 'for the greater good' the more time she spends with him…" she alluded off to the obvious conclusion.

This paranoia wasn't unusual. Ebony always had some sort of mistrust of everyone lying around in her subconscious. There was a whole other side of Ebony that came out to play when a man was involved, an ugly side you didn't want to mess with and after being caught up in that psychotic mess once she knew this chick, Amber, was in for a ride.

"I wouldn't worry about it too much, she'll fade out. The guilt card can only be in play for so long and when there is nothing else tying him to her, he'll come to his senses. Oh and Eb?" I try out the old nick name for some leverage.

"Yeah".

"Would you be able to slip me some pain killers you kind of dislocated my elbow" I try to but in a blasé way but the pain is back to being in the front of my mind.

She actually laughs, "Okay, but you remember who kicked your butt and I'll do it again if I have to"

"My god you're twisted beating up on an old friend and laughing about it" but I laugh as well because are both probably the most twisted human beings on the planet "but seriously if you don't get me those pain killers by tonight I will tell my bud Ram that you came and found me".

We both know that our threats will be carried out if the other doesn't come through. The more I think about it now, we probably don't have as much trust between as most friends would but it's a lot more than either of us is used to giving out. The door clicks and Ebony walks out and I'm back to being alone. It's pointless but I feel glad to know someone in this place, someone who I can somewhat trust.

When I look out the window I judge the time to be about six in the morning. He Technos are out and training, practicing a cross of the martial arts. I don't know why they bother I've seen the weapons they use; there will probably never be a situation when they need to use close combat. All they have to do is zap them and walk away like the heartless machines they are.

I sit there for a while, just watching them train for a lack of something better to do. It's not until what I guess is midday that someone comes for a talk.

The door clicks and I look up at who I was expecting to be Ram but am sadly mistaken. It's Jay. After what I got from Ebony last night makes me expect the worse from this not so friendly reunion. He shuts to door behind him and gives me a dark look.

"Right, we are going to have a little chat" he says in a low voice "and you're not going to like it but after what I went through yesterday I don't really care. Ram has enlightened me to your detective skills."

Ah heck, I am in trouble now.


	3. Minutes

**20 HOURS 07 MINUTES LATER- (Next Chap. 9802 word count)**

I was shaking in fury, barely able to contain the rage that is boiling under my skin. There's a mixture of disgust and self-pity biting sitting their fuelling my fire. I try to think about some way that I could justify what I've just done but nothing comes to mind. It had been so primitive and instinctual that before I could think twice or stop it had already happened. The worst part was that I had just left, like a coward, and now I can barely look anyone in the eye. Let alone the person I did it for who has gone on a witch hunt for the person that could do such a thing, that could hurt someone she had cared about enough not to want them dead. I hadn't known! If I could do it all over I would but what I have done is irreversible and all I can do now is run, run from the truth that will haunt me for the rest of my life. It's unbecoming but I feel the guilt form into the tears I shouldn't cry and the pity I don't deserve.

"Jay? What are you doing hiding away in here" She startles me out of my reverie with her tentative but hollow voice. Hollow ever since I had unwittingly killed her used to be best friend for what I thought was Ebony's protection; the excuse I had been using until she had told about her previous midnight visit and how she had straightened things out. Being around her makes me want to run, to hide, every so often to tell her what I did and then let her kill me. I look up at her standing, swaying a little and staring at me blankly.

"Oh, I'm uh" I breathe out deeply "I'm uh just looking for you, you've been so upset lately I was going to try and cheer you up. Maybe you should stay here, with me, tonight." I pat the space on the bed beside me and wait for her to sit down before I wrap my arms around hers filling a chill run through my fingers at her cold shoulders. I rub my hands over them trying to bring some warmth.

"Are you okay?" I query "You're cold to the bone" She shivers as I try and warm her up some more and with a little sniffle she leans her head on my shoulder.

"I went out there, to go and uh bury her," her voices wavers "but the body is gone Jay, they probably just dumped her somewhere. Out on a street." She makes my heart almost shatter as I watch the tears begin to fall steadily down her cheeks. "She's out there in the cold, I thought I would have a look try and give her the dignity she didn't get in her death"

These are the moments when I want to tell the truth, when I want to give her the closure she deserves and the honesty that the late Hazel would have gotten in the old days when there were cops, trials and prison for guilty people like me. I don't let the truth come out though because Ebony means to much and there was so much I gave up already just to be with her and if it ends now then Hazels' death would be more pointless than it already is. No, I need to keep this relationship and nurture it; if not for themselves then for the girl who was sacrificed for it to be. Rationalising is one of my strong points but even as I think it I know it's twisted. It's the only thing I've got so I decide to run with it in order to be able to sleep at night. For now.

"I love you" I say out of the blue. I think that I let a little more of the hurt show in my voice but it seems to calm her down more as though it reassures her that someone else cares. She pulls her head away from my shoulder and begins to smile, though only a little it's the better the moping she has done continuously for the past couple of hours. I lean down to kiss her to bring her closer to me. There is a rush from the kiss that leads to hunger I can feel running through my veins. I kiss down her neck and wait for a sign, a code word, anything really to indicate that she is feeling the same lust.

"I don't want to be alone anymore" she whispers and there is my sign. I push all the depressing emotion from the past day and give in to the warmth I feel from Ebony selfishly. Guilt can wait until tomorrow.

**20 HOURS 47 MINUTES **

The little room I am in now is a lot less pristine than the ones I'm used to from the Technos' but I am glad to be breathing the air of this one than none at all. At least for a few moments, I am sure I was dead because my parents were standing there with my grandparents smiling and telling me that it's okay to take their hand and walk with them. I had almost done it when a sudden yanking feeling tugged me back into reality and I took my first ragged breath courtesy of the lungs of a complete stranger but I was grateful all the same. He was kind, the guy who had saved my life, calls himself Slade. After what had happened in her final moments in the Techno holding cell with Jay I was feeling more than fragile, but Slade had hushed my protests as he began picking up my broken body and injecting me with something to numb the pain and put me to sleep.

Now I'm here, still trembling over the whole episode but I have a new friend in Slade I guess but I can't get what happened in that cell out of my head. One thing is for sure, Jay is a psychotic attempted killer that will one day get his karma. I've been sitting here thinking about how to exact revenge but it doesn't seem to come because that fear from those final minutes makes me want to run and hide in a hole and never see the light of society again. So, still undecided as to whether I will be the one exacting the revenge.

"You should be asleep; you have a bit of healing to do" a deep voice from the doorway chastises me. I don't need a light to know it's the good Samaritan Slade checking up. Ever since he bought me to his home, the town of Liberty he's been acting like he's the mayor of the place. He's been throwing his weight around to give me things of comfort or something that I ask for to show either he's a nice guy and who's in charge. My instincts tell me that I'm not leaving here anytime soon but unlike last time with the Technos I wouldn't mind being treated this way for a while. Slade comes down to my sit on bed.

"Just about to head to sleep until you showed up" I attempt to smile innocently "what are you doing here anyway."

His face falls into a more serious and dark expression and somewhat unreadable. When I stare a little more I notice he has dark rings around his eyes. I'm not really thinking so when out of curiosity I bring my hands up to touch them I am not planning ahead enough to guess how he would react. I bring my hands down from his face and trail down his shirt. He's wearing flimsy flannelette with cut off sleeves. I feel a tiny bit of courage make its way to my brain and now I am brave enough to make a move. I push his shirt back slightly and hesitantly but when I see his face I know he's read into what I am eluding to.

"You're weak and just back from the dead" he exasperates as I continue to slightly nudge away at his shirt "…but you are clouding my judgement" and with that he pulls my face up to his so that our lips meet. I feel secure as he holds me tight but not firm; as if I am a glass doll. It's been so long since I felt this happy that I start crying at the sheer bubbliness I feel from being cared for as he kisses the tears away. I hiccup from the mix of crying and breathlessness which makes him laugh in way that rumbles through his chest.

He lays down next me, holding me in his arms. I tell him that I won't be able to sleep because I've been having nightmares about the cell. So, in an effort to comfort he begins running his fingers through my hair and telling me a story about a boy who travelled the world trying to find the one place where happiness lives. I start to drift off when the boy gets to Paris and Slade knows, but he continues with story anyway telling it as if it were a memory and not some impromptu fiction. One of the last things I think before blacking out is as far as kidnappings' go I could be doing worse.

"…And that's where the little boy found true happiness" I hear him say through my subconscious and slowly but surely his head hits the pillow. The sound of his steady breathing is comfortable white noise that sends me back to sleep.

_He looms over her, with any angry contortion of a face which is frozen in place. She pleads with him trying to explain the situation but to no avail. The boy's face is set and hushes her telling her that the damage has been done. He begins ranting and raving on how he is going to be losing his job. There is crack as he brings his fists down on the table making her jump. _

"_You've __**ruined **__my life!" he exclaims, running his hands over the table top gripping it on the edges._

_She shakes her head and stares at him like a deer in headlights. It hadn't meant to get like this; it was just a guess she had made that had happened to be right. Words stumble out of her mouth as she tries to form some kind of explanation for what she had done. How could she have known that Ram would have taken anything she had said seriously. Ebony had taken her word for it, how come she hadn't told him about their conversation last night? She repeatedly says I'm sorry and shrinks away from his approaching figure._

"_I'm sorry!" he spits "I'm sorry! You can't just apologise for that kind of thing. Ram. Will. Waste. Me. and Ebony for that matter. You've basically signed two people to their death!"_

_His voice reaches the point that he is shrieking in rage. He comes over to her and places his hand around her throat. Not squeezing but it's certainly threatening enough to make the girl tremble uncontrollably. Small bites of rage eat away at her as she thinks about how much he is overreacting. There are so many ways to hide an affair, killing the person who lucked into finding out about it is at the bottom of list of easy options. She tries to tell him this but he won't listen he's too busy yelling at her saying how everything is going wrong because of her._

"_You've taken everything away from me!" he screams shaking his hands getting tighter and tighter._

_Every breath gets harder and harder for her._

_Breathing gets impossible._

_Black dots come and sprinkle in and out of her vision._

_One last time to attempt a breath._

_Fading, fading._

I scream at the top of my lungs until there is no air left in them. Going for the second breath I try another scream when a hand cups over my mouth muffling any sound. _Sssh, _someone whispers in my ear as I hyperventilate into the hand. The memory slash dream is something I thought Slade had helped me avoid, but I guess not. Those last few moments had been the most terrifying points in my life, worse than the virus or maybe equal it's hard to tell.

"Hey…hey calm down" Slade leaves one of his hands over my mouth and the other pinning my shoulder to the bed, "Remember where you are, okay? Remember you're in liberty. You're not anywhere near the city. You're safe"

My chest collapses' in relief as the more recent memories make their way back to the fore front of my mind. This leads me to recount the past night of er, kissing with Slade. I don't know why I did it, maybe out of gratitude or out of loneliness but it was surprisingly…nice. The awkward air around us leads me to believe that he's probably wondering what to do with the stuff that happened last night as well. Words are bit hard to form but I attempt to show that I didn't think it was a big deal.

"I don't regret kissing you last night"

He surprises and partly offends me by laughing "That? That was nothing. You must've been one sheltered kid to think that kissing someone is a big deal"

I stare at him incredulously; did he really just say that? Who the heck does he think he is saying it wasn't a big deal? It makes me question what kind of guy Slade really is; does he go sticking his tongue down other girls' throats just for the fun of it? I'm a little at the thought. He looks at me with a sly smile; acting as if he has caught me out of my fanatic crush. I roll my eyes, guys can be so arrogant. Give them some attention and their chests puff up like a balloon. Sighing heavily and looking at him, I try to convey how unimpressed I am. The awkward confusion is gone out of my system.

"Honestly, I had thought you were regretting it. Y'know what with the whole taking advantage of a girl pumped full of sedatives" I lie through my teeth.

"Uh, as I remember it YOU were the one making all the moves last night, not me" he puts his hands around his head and leans back to lie on the bed. I curse myself inwardly for being so aware of him breathing next me all the while angrily staring up at the ceiling.

"Whatever, it's over now anyway" I concede.

He laughs again with infuriating arrogance. All I want is to smack that smile right off his face but I make the excuse that my injuries are still to tender to risk it on some venting fit. The laughing fades out after a while and a more unsettling mood kicks in. Patterns on the ceiling play optical illusions dancing around as I try to ignore the obvious stare I am getting from Slade. Intuition tells me that he is probably going to ask the question I've been trying so hard to avoid. Now that he knew everything from my slurred explanation on what lead to me ending up dead and on the side of road it was the most likely thing that needed to be answered but not necessarily the one that had the easiest answer.

"Are you going back to the underground? To your sister?"

"The invasion would have meant that security protocol alpha became in place. The whole tribe is trained to be able to move from one section of the tunnels to the next. That place is a maze it would be impossible to find. It's designed that way."

I surprise both Slade and myself when I begin to cry out of sheer hopelessness. He pulls his hand out from under his head and wraps it around my shoulders. As my tears become a lot louder and uncontrollable he pulls me into his chest. It's like playing ping pong with this guy, one moment he is an insensitive and arrogant the next he is being caring. The erratic behaviour is not something I am used but I don't care. Something is better than nothing.

"You're okay, I'm sure that you'll be able to find them sometime collect some Intel look for recent disappearances and you'll get a general area" he says and I notice a hint of disdain. Does everyone in this above ground seem to hate the underground tribe?

My tears dry up, not by much, enough to stop the horrible choking noise. I pull away from him slightly, looking up at his dark eyes. His hand reaches out and his fingers begin to trace my jaw line. It's that same hazy courage that I felt last night that makes me inch closer to him. There's a moment when I feel like backing down and shrinking away because I know that this will only lead a lot more confusion later down the track. As soon as it's there it's gone because I am distracted by Slade running his fingers through my hair, ugh my kryptonite, it has to be the best feeling in the world. I wait for a little while before sitting up and swinging myself over his lap to face him. Little time passes before he grabs the top of my shoulders and brings me down to being inches from his lips. It's a game of chess now, whoever makes the next move is the one showing their cards, giving away their emotion. I refuse to be the instigator this time so I sit there waiting patiently.

"You're move" I breathe.

He groans in almost dismay but brings his lips up to meet mine. The three quarters of sleep last night has left me feeling a lot more rejuvenated. Unlike last night I wait for him to do all the queues.

"We better stop you know, we're kissing and you'll start regretting it" he whispers.

"Ssh, you're the one who guessed I was sheltered. I neither confirmed nor denied" I say between kisses.


	4. Trying

I stretch out, gingerly testing out my regained ability to move without pain. It's been about two months now since seeing my sister but I try and focus on the fact that she is safe somewhere down in the tunnels away from this madness I'm in now. Things down there seem so far away and the problems so miniscule to all that has happened with both the Technos' and now this total confusion between Slade and I. But I guess it was my fault for letting it continue for so long and the resulting awkward avoidance during the day. Tonight though I've chosen to get it out there in the open, it won't be hard to find his room; just follow the snoring. So with my newfound determination I swing my legs out of the bed and begin to make my way out the door tip toeing; just like I did when I was eight and trying to get past my parents for some midnight snacks.

"Good, now just keep moving, nerves of steel remember" I whisper to myself as I reach the door. My fingers wrap around the door knob and I go to turn but a sound behind the door stops me.

It's kissing; I can hear him kissing someone. **_What the?_** My hand grips tighter on the door as I get ready storm in there with hell's fury. How dare he, how dare he! There is no way that it is not him behind that door with another girl. Another girl. Ugh who is the girl so thick to get into bed with that liar! My rational side says _well, you did _but I shut it up. It's stupid as well.

The girl giggles," Slade, Sssh, we'll wake up my guests". I grit my teeth. I know that voice it's the owner, Ruby. My knuckles turn white as the grip on the door tightens to the point of pain. I stand there fixed on the door not moving an inch.

It takes a lot of will power but I pry my hand off the door knob and robotically turn around with stiff limbs and begin the walk back to my room. _No more hysteria, calm down, don't be like every dramatic car crash girl you've seen on TV, take the emotion out of it…come on…. No stop! Don't you dare turn back towards that door_! I think to myself as with every step the battle between my inner MTV worthy drama queen and rational stubborn pride intensifies. Hot angry tears escape my reach. My face is wet and I'm glad that I had dismissed the idea to put on some of the make-up I found in the bathroom. Sobs fall out of my lips; so much for getting away quietly. They must have been pretty loud because there are gasps behind the door.

"Do you think it's' her?" Ruby's' voice is low and casual yet there is a hint of annoyance. "Little girl having bad dreams again"

"Yes" He says darkly, "Of course it is, listen to her wailing from across the hall"

_I am not wailing! _I scream internally. Though there is some sort of crackly, distressing cry going on in the background. Oh, darn, that's me. There is scuffling and the sound of someone getting off the bed. A voice behind the door groans in contempt, probably Ruby. _Gee, I'm sorry for being a distraction_. There are footsteps making their way to the door. I don't have enough time to run and there is no place to hide so there is nothing left to do but freeze, staring at the door to my room, and crying a river. The door comes open but the footsteps stop in their tracks and I realise the jig is up.

"What-? Oh god, what's' wrong" Slade's' voice cuts out my crying "Has it got to the point that you're sleep walking now? Hello? Are you even awake?"

I bring shaky hands up to my face and wipe away the most of the wet. Spinning on my heel we are now facing each other. Maybe it's the fact that he put the dots together or he is aware that Ruby is standing behind him in the door way glaring down at me. As if catching my gaze she grabs him from behind and runs her hands over his chest. A pang catches in my heart while Slade tries to push her hands away but he's hesitant like he doesn't really want to let her go. Once he is free of her hands she sighs and steps around him but not without slinking up to his ear and a phony attempt at a whisper.

"Call out when you're done tying loose ends"

I gulp, maybe I hadn't been in love with Slade but god knows I honestly thought we could of got there.

"I. heard. y-" I say in a crackly, whiney voice. "-you. J-jerk."

He runs a hand through his hair, "Since when were we exclusive? If I had known…"

"Shut up!" I shriek, "After what we did how were we not exclusive!" _Wow, way not to sound like an obsessive freak._

"What! We never talked about it before or after," Slade's' voice raises an octave, "I thought you were just using your love 'em and leave 'em routine"

"I have a routine now? That's not even possible! Because-" I choke.

His faces freezes with his mouth open, "Oh because…"

"What you couldn't tell?" My mouth quirks up in a smile. So I was naturally gifted huh. _Yet not enough to keep him_.

"No, well you had been talking about a guy before and I assumed" his face is contorted.

"Well assumed wrong, didn't you, and by the looks of things I certainly wasn't good enough for you not to stray." I lower my head twining my fingers through the silk shift that I had been wearing to bed.

"I'm sorry-"

"No you're not," I cut in, "or you wouldn't have done it. If I had meant enough, you wouldn't have done it and if you were smart enough you wouldn't have done it. Across the hall. So loudly" Turning my back away from him I wait for some cry out; a last appeal or declaration of love. The wait is futile; he doesn't even move. I take the door handle to my room with both hands and slowly let myself in; I'm tired but I won't touch the bed. The quilt lays on the floor splayed out and it looks comfortable. So like a cat I curl up on it, bringing the edges around me, and cry. Somewhere between the night turning into a bleak dawn; I do fall asleep and there are no nightmares for me tonight. Just an empty expanse of black.

Its' midday, and I feel like I've been hit repeatedly by a truck. Ugh, what happened last night that made me end up on the floor? Oh, it's all coming back to me now. So the question is now where to go from here. Obviously staying isn't an option, which is a little awkwardness that I'd like to avoid. I rack my brain for some sort of memory or vague plan I had drawn up where the next emergency camp for the tribe was by now.

Nothing. Hm, well to the woods?

_Sounds good enough. But, hey genius how are you going to get there? With what supplies? Or is this just a suicide mission? Don't you think that's a bit drastic?_ Oh shut up, I scold myself. It isn't that hard, I don't think. Hell it'll give time to be alone and try and find one of the outposts that we use see if anyone is still there. There are a couple that were on the other side of Eagle Mountain from memory. Okay, so roughing it is a pretty viable option. I pull myself groggily off the floor. In the background there is the noise of the bar little conversations making one mess of static like noise. I hope that Slade is down there with them, with her. It will make it easier to slip out the back door; clean run is best.

There's a knock at the door and out of panic I drop back to the ground, facing away from the door, to pretend to be asleep. A second knock. My heart beats a little faster as the door clicks open. Boots clod their way over not stopping until I can feel the tips of shoes poking into my back. The person is breathing in deeply and wearing a scent of cologne and alcohol; though faint probably from the night before.

"Wake up" the foot kicks me slightly in the back "You're not really sleeping and we both know it; so up you get" Slades' voice is scathing.

I groan and flutter my eyelids open. I raise myself up and face him

"I think it's time for me to go. I'll be out of here in five" I mumble "erm, thanks for - thanks for helping me get back on my f-feet" Two steps toward the door and he grabs my shoulders and spins me around.

"A bit melodramatic don't you think?" he sighs "This wasn't some great love affair and I didn't know I was cheating at the time; considering you NEVER told me we were exclusive"

_He's right there. _"Didn't you think that-"

"We were special" he says in a mock high pitched voice in attempt to imitate me. His voice then drops back to usual as he says, "give me a break this is the real world; not a romance novel."

Tears sting my eyes out of frustration that what he's saying is somewhat rational. Maybe what he is say is true? What if I am just overreacting to the whole situation? _Then why does your gut feel so wrong about it… don't trust a word he says_.

I shrug my shoulders "Maybe I'm just old fashioned then. Maybe this was just meant to happen because we aren't right for each other"

"It was only one night! I don't see the big deal; you're making things out to be more complicated than they really are" His grip tightens and he tilts his head down to rest his chin on my forehead; in a whisper he says "Just stay, won't you? If you want this to be permanent then you'll stay. Right here. With Me"

"I can't, you know that, it won't be the same between us because of her. Because of the two of you" my voice is bare audible. I notice we are slight rocking side to side as he is holding me.

He lowers his head down so that our lips are inches apart; feeling torn I decide to meet them. The kiss is long, slow and comfortable but there is an undercurrent, a dark feeling I can't shake. He doesn't push for anything more; doesn't give off hunger or lust. I think he can feel it too, the small spark that we lost, which has left emptiness in the embrace and in the intimacy.

"You see what I mean now" I say

"It's you, you're withdrawing, and that's why it feels different"

"Shut up, for goodness sake you know it's true. You felt it"

"Are you still going to leave?"

"Yes"

"Good Luck" as the two words are spoken we disentangle from each other and I already miss the comfort of rocking with him.

It's time to go, out of here and definetly away from the city. Live off land out in the woods.


End file.
